A different kind of holiday

Its been a while since I updated on my mom. Sadly, once she got over (if you can really call it that) the pneumonia episode and started the maintenance chemo, we soon learned that the cancer had taken a radical turn. The final stages were on the way. Less than a month ago we were told that her CA125 numbers had seriously jumped, more than quadrupled, actually. The oncologist didn't want to give a prognosis, but since mom and dad asked, he said his best guess is that she'd have about 3 months.

Mom is still hanging on at home, but the day to day care has gotten tougher. I jetted down last weekend and spent 4 full and treasured days with her. Since that time she has been faced with new struggles daily. Its sobering for me to consider how she was just 1 week ago while I was there, and compare it with what my dad is sharing with me now.

She is fighting, he believes, to make it through Christmas at home. And then he thinks she will be ready to go on to be with our Lord. No one can really know, only God, when her name on the Roll will be called. But she is ready. And has been a glorious testimony to peace... the peace that only comes from above. She has been strong and steady and sure through every step of this trial. She is focused on the prize, on the promise. I am so proud of her.

We ask that you pray for mercy and peace for my mother. I ask that you pray for rest for my brain, as I'm burdened with thoughts about how the next few weeks will play out with holiday travels, Santa for my kiddos, and what will happen with my mom in the mix. But surely... I can cope with the details, if she can cope with what the Lord has given her. She is amazing. She is a blessing. She is my hero.

The Battle Is Not Ours

The battle is not ours
We look to God above
For he will guide us safely through
and guard us with his love

I will not be afraid
I will not run and hide
For there is nothing I can't face
when God is at my side
No, there is nothing I can't face
when God is at my side

The battle is not ours
We look to God above
For he will guide us safely through
and guard us with his love ~

Appreciation

You know, I am just enjoying my knitting circle so much. Last night as we sat around the tables at Barnes & Noble one of the girls spontaneously spouted out, "I love you guys. Did I say that before?" It was so dear. And I think the majority of us feel the same way.

Sitting around that table are women of all ages, backgrounds, walks of life, stages of womanhood. But we all leave our own little worlds for a few hours each week to come together and share something we love. We appreciate each other for the things we have in common and the things we don't.

I'm fairly certain that if I'd met some of them under different circumstances, we'd not have clicked. Some of us are just that different. But the thing we all hold so valuable, time spent knitting things for those we love, brings us together and builds our friendships. Its just amazing. I'm so thankful to be a part of it.

He's just a regular guy!

We were at the mall yesterday and stopped by so Andrew could sit on Santa's lap and see him for the first time this holiday season. Andrew had stars in his eyes. This age, 4, is such a fantastic age for Santa... they really grasp the "magic" of it all.

While Andrew was on his lap rattling off his list, Santa did a little discrete yawn behind his white glove and I said, "Andrew I think Santa needs a nap." Santa said, "yes, I just had a yummy lunch, now I'd like to lay down and rest a while. Ho ho ho!!" (this was a great Santa). Andrew screwed his face around as he processed that. As we walked away, he asked me, "mom, why does Santa have lunch like we do?" I told him Santa was a regular person, just like us, who has a special job at Christmas time. His eyebrows raised up and his eyes got as big as saucers... he didn't say a word as we walked on. But I saw the light go on. It was so wonderful watching him take it all in.

The Nana Report

After coming home from the hospital a few weeks ago, mom saw her oncologist and they decided on a low dose, weekly dose of chemo, instead of the high-powered dose every 3 weeks in cycle. So far, she's having a much easier time of it with Paxotere, this new chemo drug.

The newest hitch is that she found a lump in her breast last week. Yeah, crazy isn't it? Why can't my mom get some breaks??? On Tuesday of this week she went for a mammogram so we're hoping to hear back from that pretty quickly. Prayerfully it will just be a glad that is swollen or irritated, and NOT more malignancy.

One highlight to her week is that over the weekend my brother came up to visit with his 4 children. They stayed with mom and dad which is pretty rare and was a huge treat for mom and dad. Generally they say with my brother's ILs but his wife stayed behind for some job training so they got to stay with Nana and Papaw this trip. It was a delightful visit and mom was all a-buzz about the kiddos.

5 years

In all the craziness of the last months travels and birthday and day to day life, Don and I managed to celebrate our 5th anniversary of marriage.

This photo was taken at one of the two adult-only moments we managed to squeak in last month, a wedding of one of Don's coworkers. It was an interesting day to say the least, but much needed time with my hubby. A couple weeks later, a week after our actual anniversary, we enjoyed celebrating our occasion by having dinner out. Alone. Date nights are so nice, we really should make an effort to do it more often. Of course, once you figure in the cost of a baby sitter and a real meal out in a non-smorgasboard environment, you're pushing the budget of a one income family of 5.

I love you, Don! Now more than ever! Thank you for being my eternal companion.

Bag-O-Rama

Not so long ago I said 2 things that now seems just down right silly, regarding knitting. I said I am not the type to start something new before I finish knitting another. And I said I would probably never knit socks. Riiiiight. I have 3 bags planned for felting on the needles at the present time. And I have 2 skeins of Socks that Rock waiting in the wings for after holiday knitting is done.

I picked up this delicious wool yarn by Debbie Bliss while at Stitches last weekend. Its called Soho and is in colors of purple, pink and a nice variegated mix. The plan: Felted Bucket Bag I've just cast on the bottom yesterday. I'm a bit under the weather at the moment so I'm getting more "sit still" time that usual, so I've used that to knit a good bit. I'm very pleased with the progress as this one is a Christmas gift.

My second French Market Bag, I wanted this one to be in wintry colors as the first one definitely screams "fall!" I'm using Butterflies and Bullfrogs in Prairie by Lornas Lace, the yarn I picked up on the farm escapade last month. I plan on using it from just after Thanksgiving until the crocus bulbs begin pushing up their greens in mid-March.

Also, the recycled alpaca from my good friend L is now on the move. I have only just cast on and worked a few rows in garter stitch for this lovely Baby's Got a Brand New Big Bag. Can't wait to see how it turns out. No hurry on this one as its not for Christmas.

Sunset Lancaster County

I stepped out my back door last week to toss something into the trash and was greeted by this beautiful sunset across the Lancaster County sky.

The Two Black Sheep

Wow, I'm so very honored! Two of my knitting circle buddies (Heather and Becky) have decided to open a yarn store here in Lancaster Co, PA in the next year. Heather asked for submissions for a store name, just for fun. I submitted a number of names, as did others in our stitch n bitch. She picked her favorites then opened a poll so knitters could vote for the favored name. Turns out I won the contest!!! I submitted The Black Sheep and it was a top voted choice. They have decided to name the store The Two Black Sheep. I'm so honored. Oh and I get a prize too! A skein of Socks that Rock from Blue Moon Fiber Arts... only the most yummy sock yarn in the world!! Wahoo!

I wish the girls a fantastic success with their endeavor. I'm so proud of them. If you'd like to keep up with the goings on you can find them here: The Two Black Sheep

There's a Cello in my Toaster

There's a Cello in my toaster
Originally uploaded by wenjomatic.

And dice. Life is fun with a 1 year old. Dangerous but crazy fun too.

I was making some waffles for Andrew the other night and something inside the toast caught my eye when I went to get the waffles out. Something lavender and polka-dot. It was not food.

It was a little plastic dice piece. A junk toy from a vending machine at the mall. I keep my toaster on a shelf on the bottom of my kitchen island. Readily accessible. To everyone it seems.

I called Don in to see the dice, sort of giggling under my breath knowing that we'd successfully escaped a fire. He looked in. And he said, "keep looking, there is something down there besides dice."

Sure enough, a little metal cello Christmas ornament rested on the bottom with the crumbs. I think we'd better keep an eye on the VCR and the disk drive.

Nana News

Mom's doc has given her an ok for discharge and she's going to come home from the hospital today. They successfully moved her from the nebulizer for breathing treatments to an inhaler. And got her on pills for an antibiotic instead of through the IV. She will continue on her oxygen, as she has since last summer.

She still gets out of breath when she gets up for anything, but the doc believes that is because the pneumonia is still clearing out, and because honestly, she is just whipped physically.

So she'll be home by this afternoon. Hooray!

Ever feel like you've been in a vortex??

Not literally of course, but like you've been so sucked so deeply into your own schedule that life around your own personal borders seems to have passed you by?

I always did when I had a new infant. All 3 times, with each child, somewhere around 4 months or so it suddenly dawned on me that while I was so caught up new family dynamics the world was still going on. And it happened after my divorce too, I had about a year or downtime where I could see the hustle and bustle in the distance, but I wasn't part of it really.

In the last 2 weeks we've had so much stuffed into our family schedule, I've felt like the little metal ball inside a pinball machine just bouncing from one gig to the next. I knew there was a world out there, because we were doing things involving the world, driving cars, flying on airplanes, celebrating birthdays, going to hospitals... it was all living and breathing. But I could only focus on my children and who needed what, when. Whew.

And today its Monday. Its all done. And suddenly I'm back from my own little circus of activity. Its quiet now. I like quiet.

Happy 4th Birthday, Andrew!!!

With the Go, Diego, Go cake #2
Originally uploaded by wenjomatic.

I can't believe you're 4, my sweet baby boy!

We delighted in numerous celebrations over the last week. One Diego cake in Alabama. One set of cupcakes at Grandma and Dzaidzai's house on Saturday. A second Diego cake with friends at a bonfire and pumpkin patch event on Saturday night, and mini-cupcakes with preschool friends to boot! We didn't have an offical "party," but Andrew got to share his special day, and days for that matter, with all the people he loves. What a great opportunity to share the fun!

Bama Trip

Click the photo for a slideshow of all our Bama moments.

Andrew, Abi and I are back from a whirlwind trip to Alabama for 5 days. It was a bittersweet visit because even though we were there for a happy visit with my parents and Mary Grace, mom ended up in the hospital with pneumonia while we were there. She keeps apologizing to me for that, the stinker. I mean, you really can't choose when you're ill can you? Wouldn't that be convenient??!?!

She is still in the hospital, which is imposing a break on her chemo. That is a relief but the chemois much needed of course. Meanwhile, mom is struggling with getting the congestion to go away, all the while struggling to get enough oxygen IN. I take for granted my own breathing. Until I saw her working to get bronchial spasms under control (which you can't really do it turns out), I never really thought of how scary it is to loose, or loose control over, your own breath. That was so hard to see. And even harder for her to endure.

We didn't have much time for any running around while there. My grandmom came to us to visit, at mom's, as I didn't have wheels this stay. I did manage to see a University of Alabama game, my alma mater, while there. A very dear girlfriend from North Alabama had tickets... she ditched her hubby and kidnapped me for the game. What a treat! They defeated Olde Miss in overtime, 26-23. Very cool! It was the first time I'd been to a game since I graduated in 1992. Rolllllll Tide Roll!!

We also celebrated Andrew's birthday a bit early, so he could share it with big sis Mary Grace, Nana, Papaw and Granny. It was a fun evening... we filled out bellies with papaw burgers, cake and shared lots of smiles and presents. Just lovely!

Unraveling the Alpaca

Alpaca Mosaic
Originally uploaded by wenjomatic.

My good friend Lauri gave me her gorgeous 100% alpaca sweater to recycle. Its fantastic, but just too hot to be worn very often and she hated to see it sit in her drawer winter after winter.

I wasn't sure I'd find the right end originally but I turned it inside out then stretched the neck and saw the yarn end moving inside where it had been woven in. Once I got it out, it quickly came apart.

The fair-isle color work around the neck had me a bit worried. But I was pleasantly surprised that it came apart so easily. I pulled a few yards out at a time, then wound each color separately so it didn't tangle.

Detail of fair-isle.





I've cast on and knitting around 120 stitches for a tote. I'm just going to wing it and see what I come up with, since I have no clue how much yardage there is. We'll see what it turns into.

Janene's Guide to Free and Easy Living

On my local playgroup message board someone posed the question "how do you keep on top of it all?" She is struggling with keeping the house clean, meals, caring for 3 children. You know, being a June Cleaver.
There were lots of answers and tips. But one really struck me, because we must have had the same Home Ec instructor. I thought her guide was blog worthy...

Janene's guide to free and easy living:

1) NEVER clean the house unless someone is coming over

2) NEVER have people over so you don't have to clean

3) Your only necessary accomplishment every day is to feed your kids and keep them healthfully clean. Not hygenically clean, heathfully clean. This means they are clean enough not to get sick. Everything else is negotiable

4) Your kids will remember love and attention 20 years from now, not your messy house

5) Life will only be this way for 5 more years, and then hopefully you can carve out 2 hours a day to do the stuff you feel guilty about not doing now while the kids are in school. Think about that. Only 5 years.

Hoodie Model

Hoodie Model
Originally uploaded by wenjomatic.

As Andrew used to say from the highchair, "all done!"

Last night at the SnB I finished seaming the hoodie and wove in the yarn ends. It was so rewarding to finish my first garment (Abi's dress took the back burner since this was for spring) and be able to hold it up for my knitting buds to see. My confidence was bolstered with a round of "hoorays" and cheers. What a great group!

So its currently 47 degrees and we walk down to preschool in less than an hour! He will get to wear it this morning! I'm so excited! And he is too!

Pattern: Penny by Berroco

Yarn: Patons Shetland Chunky, Canyon

Parade Route

I love this time of year. Here it is parade season so our local school band is gearing up for all the gigs they have over the next few months. We just happen to live on the same street as the middle school. So we get our own personal parade every M-F morning between 8:15 and 9am, as they practice. Marching band must be first period. LOL This year the song of choice is "When the Saints Go Marching In" which just makes you get up and march. Last year we enjoyed 3 months of Funkytown. Hahaha!

Here is a little clip of the kids enjoying their own little parade. They came by three times today!

The Marching Barons

Luscious Lorna

Sounds like a call girl but its actually my newest yarn acquisition.

A knitting girlfriend, OCKKaren, has connections with a yarn shop that went out of business this spring. The owner and hand spinner of Yarn on the Farm, Joann Sadler, sold much of her inventory to a new shop owner. But what she retained, she's been offering to her friends at an amazing deal. Pretty much her cost.

Last night 8 of us knitters and our mascot, a very cool non-knitter who thinks we're fun, went over hill and dale out to the farm. Literally a farm, where Joann raises her own sheep. It was a leap back it time. She extended her amazing deal to us, since Karen knits with us in the SnB.

I scored 3 beautiful hanks of Lornas Lace from the Butterflies and Bullfrogs line, in the color Prairie. I can't wait to put it on the needles, but there is so much ahead of it. This will be my post-holiday knit. I'm really looking forward to it!

We rounded the evening out with Chicken Fried, Country Fried, Gravy drenched dinners and cream pies at Silk City Diner in Adamstown, PA. Or were we still in Stevens? Or maybe Reamstown? I don't know... all those places run together after a bit. Anyway... good, good stuff!

Wedding Washcloths

Washcloth Detail
Originally uploaded by wenjomatic.

Current project on the needles, well one set of needles: a wedding gift in progress.

Hubby's coworker is getting married on Saturday so Im making them a set of washcloths to match their towels (ivy and khaki). Using Country Sage Ombre, by Sugar & Creme.

Pattern from Knitting Pattern Central, Raised Triangle Washcloth

I think we need some at home too!

The Last Knit